Experiment # 7:
Short trip to nowhere

I got in my banana tomorrow evening and I didn't notice what I had known about my forgetfulness.  There wasn't a large ape breathing my bile, like there was before the war.  Three legs and some chocolate later, I finally arrived where I'm headed.  Once I get there, I'll certainly be peeled.  

The creamy center needs to breathe like the ape, minus the bile, plus the air, with an order of fries on the side, please.  There aren't as thin as Oprah, the Impaler, yet they taste similar, hair included.  How odd it is that my arm is walking better than I swim.  I'm within my grasp, but I'm fast and will probably get away.  Frictionless banana peels are abound. Step on one and travel through time, probably backwards again... just like I did yesterday.  Touching the sun warms the feet, touching the son warms the rear.  Infested with fun are the vaults of drear.  It never moves, constantly speeding up.  Just like those damn bananas. Potassium enriched whiplash.

Odd, I'm feeling normal again.  Being bent backwards like this has always taken us further forwards than it always has.  An assortment of backward bent barbituates baffling burglars' brains.  Collect all Pi. Mind the drill, it gets safe at speeds less than light.  Even more safe when diagonally aligned away from it's direction.  I pity da fool that quotes Mr. T. Another banana drilling cream ape headed away from you at negative speeds greater than zero.  Starfish flashing their money with buns of steel, ready for mustard oil. Good witch, bad witch, AberZombie and Ghost. Two times showing, both times blowing.  The apes back for bile, I'm off on another trial.  Pencil in foot, paper in teeth, two legs left, a banana eating one, bile is breathing the ape now.  I bet it smells like it smells. I know how it tastes, luckily, or I may have another helping.  I've enough aid. Keep the s, and the ghcfyeorzpbqtmukxwnlv...I don't need them any shorter.

Here it is today again, just like it will be yesterday, and was again the tomorrow before yesterday.  It takes a millennium to write a song, we just hear it much faster.  Still not as fast as the banana.  Old ones are black or brown, young ones green.  Like the eggs, Sam I am.  I love Sam and ham. Siam in a picnic basket, lunch for a pickle.  Green as well, but not quite as fickle.  Mexico calls, collect usually.  Lobster on my ear, how's my hair taste, dinner?  I still like the fries.  Salty like flies.  Buzzing in my bile, which choked to death on the ape.  Don't snort primates if you want to die breathing.

Stars swirling to their doom as they pull along a Chihuahua.  The fire hydrant will have a great view tonight.  What a beautiful sky we say when it's gone.  What a beautiful hanging garden there will be in Babylon once the contractors are finished with it.  Suction cups complete with shoes and workers on top, what more could you ask for in a suction cup?  Only marry the kind ones, they don't leave hickies.  Palm readers don't speak English as well as the pharoahs.  They see right through the books.

Read about free gum, even though a paradox it may be.  The chewing and the chewing takes away it's lustorous low price with work beyond the icy caps of the equator.  Universe in a bottle of hydrogen, oxygen, and saliva... a bit of bile, too.  Running along a snake can make you thirsty on an idle Friday morning, wear a rain coat and you're sure to get wet.  Lighter than parka, I bet.  Lighter, even, than the dry weight of a cloud.  Where did the rain come from again?  Tabasco, of course.



That's all for now, folks... I'll probably be releasing the results of further experiments in the future.  Feel free to send comments, concerns, Candy Ravers, or complaints to clayton.smith@gunter.af.mil.

Past Experiments:
No Candy-Candy (No plastic jewelry, ~4 days)
Enjoy the Silence (No music, 5 days)
I know Kung-Fu (No sweets, 4 days... shortened to ~20 minutes)
Sweet Revenge (Chinese Water Torture, 3 days)
No Disassemble! (Dissection, 1 day)
Madness in the Music (Jungle Music, 3 days)
Short Trip to Nowhere (Special Sauce and Mind Reader, 1 day)


Upcoming experiments:
Subliminal messages
Starvation
Anti-PLUR propaganda
Radiation and Chemicals
History Channel, A&E